Tis The Season - Holiday Ideas to Keep the Spice in Your Relationship

The holidays can be a very stressful time. The economy today does not help either. Worries over job issues and financial difficulties can really take its toll. Which means now more than ever is the time to make sure it does not take its toll on your relationship. Your partner is feeling the stress just as much as you are. Maybe even more.

So screaming at him “put the lights up, decorate the tree, don’t forget to pick up this or pick up that" will get you nowhere. It can only lead to even bigger fights. So you want some things done? Here are some ideas

What Do You Wear To Bed?

I think the longer you are in a relationship, the more likely it is that you might forget how sexy you are.  Or for that matter, how to be sexy and how sexy you can be.  For instance, why do we as women stop wearing the sexy outfits that we used to wear to catch our man? I think it’s because
we get too comfortable. 

Men are very visual. You and I both know that. They can get turned on by the Victoria Secrets commercials.   Do you actually think those ads were designed for you?  NO. They are targeting men.

So let’s talk about your night-time wear. This is something you already know, but your man does not want to rub against flannel. I know it might be cold outside but it’s going to get awfully cold in the bedroom if you wear anything that involves feety feet’s, plaid flannel, or even a very long nightgown with long sleeves and feels like a hospital gown.

The t-shirts and sweats have to go too. No man gets turned on by your work t-shirt from the office picnic and if you have been in the t-shirt all day then he is really going to roll over and pay no attention to you.  By wearing these types of articles to bed you are also giving him the signal that there is going to be no love making going on tonight. Men are simple and they read into things just like we do. 

So if you’re wearing something that turns him off he is taking it as you saying NO. If you want your man to snuggle with you and show more affection then wear something worth snuggling up to. 

Now I am not saying you have to dress in over the top lingerie with garters and crotchless panties.  Save that outfit for an over the top night.  What I am saying is throw out all your pjs with bunnies on it, the things your grandmother would sleep in, the old t-shirts and sweats, etc and go shop for something silky cute and very baby dollish.

You could even go online to shop and ask your man "what would you want me to wear to bed that would be both comfortable for me and sexy for you?".

For more tips and advice, please be sure to order my book!

Making Eye Contact ....Do You Really Look at Him When Making Love?

They say the eyes are the window to the soul and I definitely believe this is true.  But I don’t care how long you have been with your partner there may come a time when you stop “looking” into his eyes.  You eventually start talking "at him" not "to him". You may even fall into yelling across the room expecting him to hear you. And if he doesn’t answer well that’s his problem. But that’s not his problem and it will become yours.

When was the last time you sat down and really looked into his eyes while

Do You Thank Him Enough? And How Do You Thank Him?

"Thank you" - two small words that can mean so much to everyone and especially to your partner.  Letting him know how grateful you are can really help your relationship. Sometimes we can get so caught up in finding the things that he does that irritate us that we forget the small things that he does to make us happy.

Sure you can say "thank you" for the big things (Whatever those big things are to you).  But what about the small things?  Do you take the time to notice and appreciate them or do you

FaceBook Fan Page and Twitter Launched

Just a quick post to announce that you can now become my fan on FaceBook or follow me via Twitter.

Links are provided on the right-hand menu of this site, and you can also visit the links below if you'd like:

Rebecca Groves

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And if you don't have a copy yet, there are now two ways to order my book.  Please click here for details on ordering my book.

Do You Remember to Baby Your Man?

I once met a guy that just had his first child. "I am so happy about being a father" he proudly shared with me. But he also then confessed that even though the joys of being a father were so overwhelming he was sort of jealous of the baby. "Jealous?" I privately thought. How could a father be jealous of his own child? Seriously, a baby? 

He said that all his wife did was cuddle the baby, kiss the baby, rock the baby, even having the baby sleep with them. Everything was about "The Baby" It seemed to him that

Your Jealousy Could Drive Him Away

There are all sorts of different jealousies. There are the friendship jealousies and the status jealousies, which focus on material things. And then there’s the love jealousies....the worst of them all.

This kind of jealousy can consist of the worst emotional roller coaster imaginable. Leading to anger, distrust, rage, sadness and disgust. This kind of jealousy is the fear that your mate has desires to have sexual activity with someone else.

When you come to this point with your partner, there’s no telling what

Hot Movies By Rebecca Has Launched!

Recent studies and news stories such as this report from CNN have found that women are becoming more and more comfortable with watching adult movies.....or porn as it's often called.  And many of the producers of the movies, including some female producers, have even begun to make movies specifically for women audiences.  Sexual pictures, sounds, and video can be just as arousing for women as it can be for men and can definitely act as an aphrodisiac.

And I strongly suggest that the women I work with at least try it out.  Not only can it help a woman get more in touch with her own sexuality, it can of course be a fun way to spice things up with your mate.  Imagine how excited he might get to know that you'd like to lay in bed with him and watch something x-rated.  And imagine how much fun it might be to act out some of the ideas that you get from the films. 

So, to help you explore adult movies in the comfort of your own home, I've launched HotMoviesByRebecca.com.  There, you can download movies to watch later or stream them and watch movies by the minute.  I love the pay-per-minute option as it allows you to browse as many movies you want until you find one you really like.  And if you find one that you think you'd like to share with your man, then you have the option to download it for later.  Trust me, if you download porn to watch together then I promise he'll figure out all the technical details of how to hook your computer up to your TV!

Just for registering on HotMoviesByRebecca.com, you'll receive 10 free minutes to watch movies using the pay-per-minute option.  So, you have nothing to lose....give it a try!

What are Kegel Exercises and Why are they so Important?

Most women know how important it is to exercise and stay in shape in order to keep a man interested. But if you are not exercising any other part of your body, then your pelvic area is one you should really pay attention to. Many women do not realize or forget how important kegel exercising is.

As we grow older we lose muscle tone to the muscles of the pelvic floor. Other factors that cause this are pregnancies, being over weight, abdominal surgery or a multiple supply of partners also weaken this muscle.

So what are kegel exercises? Kegel exercising consists of....

Foods to Increase Sexual Desire & Sex Drive

They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. I don’t think it’s the kind of food you feed him as much as it is how you feed him but there are some foods that have been known to increase the sex drive that you can find at your local supermarket.  Some examples are....

Toys By Rebecca Has Launched

Many of the women that I've coached in the past have been curious about sex toys and how they might be able to spice up their relationships. Of course, they can be fun to play with when alone too!  But walking into a store to buy toys usually involves driving to a seedy part of town and let's just say the customer service at these places isn't on par with Nordstrom.

So, I'd like to invite all of my readers to check out ToysByRebecca.com, my new site offering toys, lingerie, lubricants, DVDs, and other fun items.

Future entries on this blog will include detailed reviews and recommendations of the items on ToysByRebecca.com as well as how they can help with your relationships. I also plan to start hosting sex toy parties in the Dallas area in the near future for women who would like to learn more about how toys can help improve their relationships.

How to Order My Book, Lessons Learned From a Courtesan

This blog is partly based on a book I wrote in 2006 titled Lessons Learned From a Courtesan.  The book was designed as a workbook for women to explore their sexuality and to help them keep their husband from cheating.  My book is still available and there are two easy ways to order your own copy.   The first option is to order a copy from Amazon for $15.95 by clicking here.

Or you can order an autographed copy at $19.95 directly from me through PayPal by clicking the Buy Now button below.

To order an autographed copy, please fill in the Autograph Instructions box with any special requests and click Buy Now.  You will then be taken to Pay-Pal to complete the order.

Autograph Instructions

Welcome to Lessons By Rebecca!

Welcome to Lessons By Rebecca! In 2006, I wrote a book titled “Lessons Learned From A Courtesan”. The subject matter of that book consisted of observations I had made while working as a courtesan, or escort, in the Dallas area as “Rebecca of Dallas”. The goal of the book was to help women prevent their husband or spouse from cheating on them and offered both insight into the male mind and exercises for women to work through. Following the book, I joined The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists in order to continue working as a relationship life coach and sexuality life coach. My goal with this website, is to continue helping women with their relationships and sexuality.

Ideally, I’d like to empower every woman to find her inner beauty, all of the things that makes her special and unique. And to then help her believe in that beauty and consequently to believe in herself. I’ll also continue to share my life’s experiences, both the struggles and the successes, with each of you to demonstrate that no matter how flawed you may think you are, you do have the power to feel beautiful and therefore be beautiful and sexy. I want to connect with you in a mental, and perhaps even slightly spiritual way, because I have found that being beautiful and sexy is all about thinking that you are beautiful and sexy.

My website is designed to offer you a number of different options to work with me to find this inner beauty. My book is still available and may be ordered through Amazon or directly from me. Having a copy of my book will provide you the chance to learn some of my secrets in the privacy of your own home. I also plan to offer everything from one-on-one counseling sessions to girls night out parties that will enable you to interact with me in a variety of ways. In addition, I plan to create a store to help you buy clothes, toys and perfume to enhance your self esteem and your experiences with your partner.

This blog and web page will be focused on women and what women can do to change their relationships. Whether you're married and need to add a little spark back into your relationship, or you're dating and want to know what to do to keep him interested. This site is for you. This site is all about you. And what I hope to do is provide a path to enable you to become the most beautiful and sexy woman that you can be. I look forward to working with you to realize your hidden potential that I know each of you has within you.